That made you look! Week 18 (17 weeks and 5 days to be exact). I’ve just seen the midwife at UCLH. I don’t know what I expect them to do but so far, these appointments are a massive anti-climax. I’m an intellectual snob I know but these midwives seem mediocre to me. Not dynamic, not proactive . Don’t get me wrong, this is likely my problem, my overly high expectations. I’m sure they are doing a great job. She took my blood pressure, which was pretty low, so took it again and it has risen to a reasonable level, she listened to the baby’s heart and asked a few questions; had I thought about the birth? – yes, epidural and all the drugs possible! – Was I feeling okay? – yes – and that was about it. I should really be pleased. All going smoothly. However, with my tendency for boredom, I’m always wanting something more. Plus as I’ve said before, the EGA Wing at UCLH is brand new and very well run. Less waiting around than at their private IVF clinic, one of the best in the country, the CRGH.Week 18 ( 17 weeks and 5 days to be exact). I’ve just seen the midwife at UCLH. I don’t know what I expect them to do but so far, these appointments are a massive anti-climax. I’m an intellectual snob I know but these midwives seem mediocre to me. Not dynamic, not proactive . Don’t get me wrong, this is likely my problem, my overly high expectations. I’m sure they are doing a great job. She took my blood pressure, which was pretty low, so took it again and it has risen to a reasonable level, she listened to the baby’s heart and asked a few questions; had I thought about the birth? – yes, epidural and all the drugs possible! – Was I feeling okay? – yes – and that was about it. I should really be pleased. All going smoothly. However, with my tendency for boredom, I’m always wanting something more. Plus as I’ve said before, the EGA Wing at UCLH is brand new and very well run. Less waiting around than at their private IVF clinic, one of the best in the country, the CRGH.
I hate this blog. It was fun for a while but I’m starting to despise it. Maybe despise is an exaggeration but nevertheless, I’m fed up. Whether it be with the blog, its lack of overnight success (remember I can be a very overoptimistic optimist!) or just my mood in general . I may well be the most miserable mother-to-be in NW London – there , only a small exaggeration this time – I try to not be too monotonous. I’m bored. Still. I was bored last week and I’m bored this. Wild partying, drink and drugs all give you a false sense of happiness as well as the excitement that I crave and that I’m not getting now. Am I a lost cause? B is already getting worried that I’ll go back to my partygirl ways the minute the baby is hatched but I’m not so sure. Granted, I will party. Maybe once a month is the plan ( ‘is she mad?’ I hear all you new mothers saying to yourselves ! ‘ She’ll be too tired to even brush her own hair ‘. Maybe I will but I’m certainly looking forward to feeling more like myself again. I actually hope that a new , better, more content me is reborn with the new baby. Contentment being the operative word and one of the most elusive of all emotions. Continue Reading
Who would’ve thought, this time last year, for example, that I’d be sitting here, nearly 16 weeks pregnant today? 25 weeks to go! I’m ill. Have been for the last 5 days. It started off as lunch for 14 ( 6 of whom were toddlers-not my scene) at Pizza Express on the Birthday BBQ Sunday. Yes, I got my wish (a bit strong but still), the weather was miserable so the BBQ for 40 had to be called off and a more civilized Birthday Lunch for 4 at Caprice attended on the day (Bank Holiday monday) instead – I’d like to point out that they have put their prices up too, how very dare they!! Anyway, the shock of the Pizza Experience (my best friend had offered to bring a camera to take a picture of my face during the experience) coupled together with having friends to stay who were all to a smaller or larger extent cold-ridden have left poor pregnant one suffering with no respite from any medicine. Not even paracetamol. My GP assured me that i could take it, I know it’s deemed safe, however a few Danish studies ( they are always Scandinavian !) link paracetamol to undescended testicles ( http://www.thebabywebsite.com/article.2418.Is_Paracetamol_Safe_in_Pregnancy.htm) Even our local pharmacist ,who we know well, recommended not taking paracetamol ‘ because I care, don’t take anything’. So with the intention of being a superb mother, I am playing the martyr! Continue Reading
Yes, it’s me. Me, again. Me! Me! Me! I’m feeling sorry for myself and quite down. Week 14 now. Having breezed ( mostly) through the first trimester into the second, which is supposed to be when you feel at your best, i’m miserable again. I think it might have something to do with the American Pregnancy Association. That’s who i’ll blame. Their weekly email update on pregnancy says at 14 weeks ‘ you may begin feeling extremely moody at this point’, so i’ve obliged! Continue Reading
I’m getting sick of my own writing style. It seems a tad narcissistic to blog about oneself. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I’m really only doing it for the money! I’m still delusional enough or a positive enough person ( however you look at the world) to believe it’s worth having hope. I must admit, also, that although In the past I would have turned my nose up at the idea, writing is somewhat therapeutic. Especially helping to pass time for someone as impatient as myself. Tube journeys to the hospital and waiting around are no longer hiking my stress levels sky-high.
Today, I’m on the Tube off to meet a very good friend for lunch . Someone I met a long time ago when I was working in a French bank. An analyst back then and the smartest person I know by far in the investment world. Anyway, I’ve had to avoid him for the last four months as one of my drinking/lunching buddies. It would have been too obvious otherwise. Added to that is that fact that as a dear friend, I really wanted to tell but B really reigned me and my big mouth in so against all my instincts I kept quiet.
Just met him for a very convivial lunch. Cheap and cheerful Turkish at Tas in Farringdon. I can almost say that I’m starting to enjoy sober meals out. Diet Coke (just the odd one, mind) is the new Pinot Grigio. I’m definitely happier and more relaxed. Everyone keeps saying.
I’m in the ante natal ward at UCLH now (my second time this week but this time to see the consultant) and it’s still a pleasant and uncrowded place to be. Theres a lady with a tiny, tiny baby standing 5 feet away. I’m actually thinking it’s cute and not hating it for once. Perhaps I’m coming to terms with being pregnant and I’m able to appreciate it. I think it also comes down to the fact that I’m super relaxed re work. My ‘boss’ is off for three weeks ‘working’ so I don’t even need to go to the office for an hour a day to ease my guilt. I’ve been to pregnancy pilates this morning. I really enjoyed it. At Pilates Art Physiotherapy in Kilburn High Road. Mat classes taught by physiotherapists. Very thorough and a nice teacher named Maria. It was a hard workout but a good one as I actually worked some of those lazy muscles of mine!
Blimey, I’m almost raving for me. I’m in a good mood. This is becoming a scary habit! Continue Reading
Indulging a passion for perfection. Researching and reviewing luxury, family lifestyle. Huffington Post blogger and freelance journalist.
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